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Talkabout Tuesday 19: Are We Ageist?

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Summary

Different expectations for different ages - yes, somewhat ageist but appropriate. All ages expected to follow rules, attend JC/school meeting, be honest, keep safe. But 5-year-old making mess vs 12-year-old making same mess - different patience levels. Young kids switch activities instantly, leave things behind - developmental stage. Give younger kids longer runway. Older kids' willful defiance is the problem. Off-campus policy: 5-year-olds need someone 15+. Both 7 and 15 year olds equally capable of self-governance.

Transcript

0:00 Welcome to ANI in the air talk about Tuesday where I talk about something
0:05 related to Sudbury schooling. So today I thought I'd ponder the question are we
0:11 ageist? So basically we have a variety of students of different ages and we do
0:23 have expectations that are different for the different age groups. We have a
0:28 certain sort of foundational level of expecting to follow our rules. Everyone
0:34 expecting to show up for JC when they're either in a case or on the team.
0:42 Expecting to show up to school meeting. In other years we expect them to do
0:48 short time you know and and generally we have this expectation of them complying with you
0:58 know the you know what school meeting has decided. We expect them to kind of
1:06 participate in it if they care and expect them to be honest and expect them to be
1:19 able to keep themselves and others safe. So you know that's true of all ages but
1:27 then there's you know if a five-year-old makes a mess in the sunroom you know
1:36 that feels like something well we address with JC and so forth. If a 12
1:42 year old makes that same kind of horrendous mess that feels a very
1:47 different thing. I mean we'd still go through JC but our our patience with the
1:52 whole thing would be much more limited than with the younger students. So I
2:01 guess is that ageist and I guess I would say yes. I mean there's a certain
2:10 understanding of you know where people can be you know that's really kind of
2:21 like a developmental stage right. I've seen it many times where young students
2:27 are engaged in something then it's almost like they were never they were
2:32 never there they're they've switched to something else and they moved on. That
2:38 happens with older people even adults but it seems much more frequent with
2:42 young kids and so we have a certain tolerance of it and so you know our
2:49 pathway we don't change our rules but determine whether a rule is broken it's
2:56 really just the first step and then you know there's actions and then they're
3:05 seeing whether they comply with the actions whether they change their rule
3:09 breaking etc. There's also a feeling I think that with the young ones it can
3:20 often be you know I mean there are limits to our patience with what they
3:26 might do but on the whole we're willing to give them a much longer runway so you
3:39 know that's just yeah we just think it's more appropriate we just have a
3:46 different notion of what's going to take it you know that warnings and just
3:52 coming to JC a lot of times will get the message through to them more than some
3:59 sort of something more severe we don't really like to do severe stuff with the
4:06 older ones we tend to just think that they are understanding what we're trying
4:11 to communicate and they're being willful when they don't do things and it's that
4:17 kind of willful defiance that you know we have a real problem with so you know
4:28 I think I think it's you know I mean I guess on the other hand if we well so
4:39 there's also the possibility and we've had this occasionally when a somewhat
4:45 older student seems to have behavior and actions that are more in line with
4:54 someone who might be five and but they're dangerous because they're so
4:59 much bigger you know you know ten or eleven year old pushing someone around
5:08 particularly pushing a five-year-old around this is very different than a
5:12 five-year-old pushing someone around or pushing a five-year-old around right like
5:17 there are these differences that really do matter and so yeah I think we just
5:29 but we're we don't I guess the thing we don't do is say that you know kids of a
5:37 certain age can't do this or that generally speaking I guess we do have an
5:42 off-campus policy that has you know like a five-year-old has to be someone 15 or
5:48 older you do have those things but they're pretty rare and you know in
5:59 general we do take the attitude that young kids perfectly capable of
6:04 governing themselves and following what we need to see happen in the school and
6:10 you know so like we don't think a seven-year-old needs to be watched
6:19 anymore than a 15 year old they both have reasons to be watched and then
6:25 there's a lot of good reasons not to watch either of them closely like when
6:31 left to their own devices they both will get into some trouble but not too much
6:36 trouble that's just the nature of the exploration of growing up how that
6:44 happens it's different the young ones run around a lot and make messes a lot
6:49 the older ones talk and laugh a lot more and delve into topics that I don't want
6:59 to hear and you know that's their world so you know it's they're just exploring
7:12 all the reaches and yeah I don't know guess I've kind of drone down long
7:20 enough but well have a good one and I will see you when I see you